It's been 5 years!

I've shared my story about my weight struggles before. I haven't told the whole story though. Those who've known me for more than 5 years know I used to be 251 lbs (at 5'6). I struggled with my weight most of my adult life. I tried a bunch of different fad diets, I've tried different types of pills (prescription and non). I've had some success. The most I lost was about 30 lbs during a dieting phase. In Sept 2012 I had been working on my latest diet/exercise phase. I was down about 25 lbs since May of that year. I went out to the basketball court to get in some exercise and POP! I ended up with a full tear of my Achilles. It was the worst pain in my life! I remember sitting in the doctor's office when he finished putting the cast on. He told me the cast would be on for 6 weeks, then I'd get it removed and have to do rehab for the leg. He said at least a 6 month recovery time and closer to a year before I get back to 100%. I didn't show it at the office but in that moment I died inside! I was thinking 'those 20+ lbs I lost over the last 4-5 months will all come back! What am I gonna do?!"

6 weeks later, I got the cast off and realized I still had to use crutches for weeks because my leg was so weak. Daily "wins" were being able to put pressure on the leg for more than 5 seconds. I didn't have the money to go to rehab so I only went to a couple of sessions. I looked up the exercises on line and did them at home on my own. My leg started to get stronger and yes, I did pick up all the weight I lost plus another 5-10 lbs.

December 2012 was the 2nd domino to fall that really changed my life. A good friend of mine (and at that time I didn't have a lot of "good friends") died of a heart attack. Rocked my world. A guy only a couple years older than me--died suddenly of a heart attack! I couldn't believe it. I had to lose weight again! I couldn't let that be me! February 2013 the next domino fell--probably the one that was the most significant. My oldest daughter told me she was pregnant. World rocked again! I'm going to be a grandfather! I had to get myself together! I went back to my doctor for the prescription pills I had found some success with. Surely that would help! Not this time. I don't know if my body had gotten used to it, but now I could barely lose 5lbs on the pills.  I went into a depression for several months. I didn't tell my family about it. I felt lost. I honestly did not think I would live another 5 years. I was back to over 245 lbs. I was coming off an Achilles tear--still not 100%. The weight loss I tried wasn't working. I was doomed!

July 6, 2013 my oldest grandson Caden was born. He was the last domino to fall for me. Holding that precious baby in my arms got me out of my depression and got me motivated.  I knew if I was going to live long enough to see this child grow up, start school I had to do something. A friend of mine had researched gastric by pass surgery. I always thought that was for people with money--not us "common folk." I never thought it was an option. I didn't realize that it had been around so long that it was now an accepted practice that most insurances will cover a significant portion of it. At this point, cost didn't matter to me. If I had to go into debt the rest of my life, at least I'd have a "life" to do that for! I scheduled myself for a meeting in September 2013 and got the ball rolling.

January 2014 I got the surgery! It saved my life. I followed the regiment, dropped 90 lbs in a year and got into running as a hobby/addiction. As I was sitting in a tub soaking my sore body from running my second marathon, it had just dawned upon--it's been 5 years! It's been 5 years since I sat in depression thinking I was not going to live another 5 years if I stayed on the course I was on. To God be the glory!!! In these last 5 years I've been blessed to see my grandson grow up, start pre school. I even have a 2nd grandson Cole. I've had the pleasure of watching him grow and we just celebrated his 3rd birthday. I've watched my oldest daughter graduate college. My son graduate high school and attend college. This Sunday (May 6th) I will have the honor of walking my oldest daughter down the aisle as she gets married.

God has richly blessed my life. While I say the surgery changed my life I know that all this time God was directing my steps. He needed me to see the despair I was in to know what He had planned for my life. I feel reborn out of the ashes. As I reflect on this gift of life He's given me I can't help but think about what God wants me to do with this life He's given back to me. I need to do some more soul searching on this. In the meantime, I'm going to try and be the best version of myself I can--so that it honors Him!

If you are reading and can relate to the depression, pain and suffering know that God is real. Know that He loves you and He has a plan for you. What may seem difficult or impossible CAN be overcome! Remember God is in the miracle business! "I can do all things through Him that gives me strength!" Phil 4:13 NIV